Lifestyle

Sugar Daddies and Female Independence

A recent Psychologies article delved into the reason behind why some people,  women in particular, tend to remain single for much of their lives. 

The female author reflected on her own life experience and wondered if friends were the reason she was single. Her research led her to a book ("The Single Trap") by Andrew G Marshall which described how some people are too heavily invested in platonic relationships, leaving little room for romantic ones.

Despite this revelation, the single author also wrote about her dread of questions regarding her love life, likening the social situation to one where someone having an IVF is asked whether they are pregnant yet.  And here is the problem. Society seems to be ok with single men and not-so-young eligible bachelors,  but when it comes to women the public consensus is that they should  get married eventually.

This, of course, is predominantly a Western problem, but it does replicate itself in many countries across the globe. With rising standards and population numbers women have to work harder than ever to reach a good level of financial stability.  This involves going through years of further education and countless late nights at work climbing the career ladder. And then, being the well rounded individuals that we women are, we like to spend some time on hobbies and unfortunately have to also sort out menial housework. With all of that going on, who has the time for dating? Is it really a surprise that marriage and first births are happening much later in women's lives today then a few decades ago?

The life of the modern female professional is not everyone's cup of tea. The tough economic climate and rising demands from employers have pushed some women into what the past female generation which was raised to believe women should provide for themselves would see as appalling.  This 'something' is called shopping for sugar daddies.

Fuelled by an appetite for millionaire hunting,  hundreds of young women gather at special dating events like the New York Sugar Daddy convention.  During such events women in search of a luxury lifestyle mingle with successful bachelors in the hopes that they will make an arrangement (i.e. the exchange of generous financial support for companionship).

Why do these women do it?  They feel the need to be around successful,  rich men in order to have status. They also don't want to spend 15 hours a day working their ass off in order to reach their lifestyle goals when they can be making up to £240 per date.

There are also less shallow reasons why women are in search of the so called sugar daddies and that's business investor recruitment. How successful they are at achieving this through such dating events is questionable,  but one thing is for certain - these women are looking for a short-cut to success and wealth.

But aren't we all? Who wouldn't want to have their private yacht taking them on a tour of the Maldives or their own jet dropping them off in different cities across the globe? Who wouldn't want not to worry about paying bills and saving for the next holiday?

Although sugar daddy dating is a step to far (and it's aggravating gender inequalities), it is a blatant example of how money focused our society has become. So much so that we are willing to abandon the values of female independence and success previous generations worked so hard to instil in us.

Winds of (Career) Change

Just like anything else in life, choosing a career is not easy. On the one hand youngsters are advised to make career choices as early as possible, on the other those already in employment are often encouraged to chase "what makes them happy". We are told: "Choose your path early, but remember you can change it later." 

Is this true? Is it rational? Can you make a sound choice when you haven't tried your hand at something? And can you really change your career any time you like?

These are, indeed, chicken-and-egg-type of questions. The truth is, it takes a while to figure out what you want. And by the time you figure that out, you probably want something else. As sociologists say - the only certain things in life are death and change.

So if you have decided to change winds because you can't face "another day at work", then don't panic.

Changing careers will always have some obstacles, but it is not impossible. Research is key here and the best place to start is to try and figure out your key character traits, strengths and what you enjoy most. 

And here I must say one of the top (and free) online tests to look out for is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) test. I am impressed at how a few (seemingly) random questions can reveal so much about yourself. Of course, we know most of the things such tests tell us, but we may not always be aware of how we can use this knowledge to choose the right career and achieve self-actualisation.

The test puts you in one of several personality types based on 8 character traits: introvert, extrovert, sensing, intuition, thinking, feeling, judging and perception.

Of course, there are many other tests. And of course the MBTI isn't 100 % accurate (some critics completely dismiss it). But it's pretty close. And it's fun!

A Post to Remember

In the gear up to Christmas and New Year, I wanted to write a meaningful post. One which will change my readers' thoughts, and hopefully their actions for the better. There were a lot of options tossed on the table (like why people should join online reunions - thanks J & S). But then I woke up on this fine Sunday morning and came across something fairly disturbing.

As some of you may know, I am keen or getting my feet firmly into PR world and am an avid reader of PR-related news and academic articles. This morning, however, I was not conducting yet another search on top PR campaigns. Yet, I came across (via social media) a very powerful PR campaign. One that relates to our consumerist age and the impacts of mindless and excessive shopping. 

Recently I posted a photo (see above) on my Facebook page (click on the circle button to the right) about buying local produce and how that can help someone in your community pay college or their child's dance lessons. Last year I also wrote an article for my university's student press about the effects of Christmas frenzy shopping and how the environment and the factory workers were suffering just to make our holidays "filled with joy".

But this is on a whole new level. This campaign is not here just for Christmas and the Boxing day sales which will ensue. It is here to stay and I am sure it is one you will remember for years. The original writer asked for this to be reblogged and I am happy to oblige. Read on, my dears, but be aware it may be a bite too big to swallow:

“A young woman was restrained, force-fed and injected with cosmetics in a high street shop window as part of a hard-hitting protest against animal testing.

Jacqueline Traide was tortured in front of hundreds of horrified shoppers in a bid to raise awareness and end the practise.

The 24-year-old endured 10 hours of experiments, which included having her hair shaved and irritants squirted in her eyes, as part of a worldwide campaign by Lush Cosmetics and The Humane Society.

The disturbing stunt took place in Lush’s Regent Street store, one of the UK’s busiest shopping streets.

Jacqueline appeared genuinely terrified as she was pinned down on a bench and had her mouth stretched open with two metal hooks while a man in a white coat force-fed her until she choked and gagged.

The artist was also injected with numerous needles, had her skin braised and lotions and creams smeared across her face.

Passers-by were gobsmacked to see Jacqueline, a social sculpture student at Oxford Brookes University, forced to have a section of her head shaved.

The gruesome spectacle aimed to highlight the cruelty inflicted on animals during cosmetic laboratory tests and raise awareness that animal testing is still a common practise.

The Humane Society International and Lush Cosmetics have joined forces to launch the largest-ever global campaign to end animal testing for cosmetics.

The campaign, launched to coincide with World Week for Animals in Laboratories, is being rolled out simultaneously in over 700 Lush Ltd shops across forty-seven countries including the United States, Canada, India, Australia, New Zealand, South Korea and Russia.

Lush campaign manager Tamsin Omond said: “The ironic thing is that if it was a beagle in the window and we were doing all these things to it, we’d have the police and RSPCA here in minutes.

“But somewhere in the world, this kind of thing is happening to an animal every few seconds on average.

“The difference is, it’s normally hidden. We need to remind people it is still going on.”

For more information about the campaign, visit www.fightinganimaltesting.com”

I HOPE EVERYONE READS THIS AND REBLOGS IT!

Yes, it is insane. But it has also made a valid point. I will leave it to the PR experts to determine whether this is a campaign taken to the extreme or a new generation buzz creator. All I know is that it has a strong message behind it. A message that we should all remember.

How To Save Money on Food

Photo by Sean MacEntee

Recently I read a London columnist's despair at his wife's dinner party tactics. Why? Because she usually bought so much salad (and other party nibbles) which often made their way in the rubbish bin. He was certain that not even salad should go to waste! "What about the poor children in Africa?", he asked. So he began freezing leftovers, even bread, and used them for work lunches or as treats for his colleagues.

That very same columnist called food waste "a lunacy". I agree. In this day and age, not only are we wasting food, but we are wasting a lot of MONEY on food too. And, let's be honest, it is not like we are spending on good food. Most of the time we are so busy that we end up spending our money on food that is sold to us as 'good' but it has little nutritional value.

So how do we change this? How can we spend less money AND eat better? Here are a few tips on giving your wallet and stomach a break.

1. It pays to plan. The art of cheap healthy food comes from the science of meal planning. It is not as hard or as time consuming as one would imagine. Pick a day of the week when you will plan you meals for the next 5-7 days and do your shopping. I also tend to do my cooking on the same day. Why? Read the next point.
2. Get friendly with your freezer. If you lead a busy lifestyle, it is essential that you prepare at least half of your meals for the week ahead. Cook 2 or 3 large portions of your favourite dishes, divide into boxes and freeze. That way, you don't have to cook everyday!
3. Save the snacks. Try to buy your favourite healthy snacks in bulk so you have enough for the week. Not only is bulk buying cheaper, but it will also help you avoid splurging on calorific treats when you are out & about. Keep them in your bag, kitchen cupboard or office drawer for a quick hunger killer when 24 hours simply aren't enough!
4. Lovely leftovers. Couldn't finish a meal? Surely you can't just throw it away! Most meat leftovers can be used to make curries, risottos, stews or just great sandwiches. If you can't be bothered to cook at all, just freeze the leftovers - that can be added to your weekly " frozen ready meals" from point 2.
5. Vote for veggies. Instead of going for quick carb and fat fixes (i.e. pasta, cheese, pizzas, etc.) clean and cut your veggies on your meal plan day and store in the fridge or freezer. That way you can cut your cooking time in half and avoid binges on junk food!

Of course, there are countless other tips and tricks but one thing is important - the food you prepare at home will almost always be cheaper and healthier than anything you buy from outside. With that in mind, try to have as many home-made meals as possible, even if it means spending several hours on one day of the week to cook and freeze them!

How to Put Forward a Formal Complaint

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 How many times in life are we faced with poor quality services/products, disorganised staff, or false promises from businesses?

I don't know about you but for the past year I have been dealing with loads of these! And I'm not the one to keep quiet when I believe something is not fair. And so I've learnt that it pays off to raise your hand and say enough, to speak up, even to fight back!

Some time ago I helped an acquaintance to write a complaint letter (after convincing her it was the right thing to do) and, lo and behold, the company who was at fault refunded her!

Yes, I know that complaints procedures are tedious and time-consuming, but with a bit of practice and patience chances are the issue(s) would be resolved and/or compensation will be received.

Image courtesy of imagerymajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

After recently hearing someone say that "British people don't complain enough", I decided to put together a post with few tips on how to complain (in the correct way of course!). Here's how to get started:

1. Follow a formal letter format - make sure you include your address, the date, and the addressee's address.
2. Always address the reader of the letter (e.g. Dear Mr X, Dear Manager, Dear Customer Services Team, etc.)
3. Start by clearly stating that this letter is a formal complaint about a particular incident, product or service.
4. Then outline in detail the problem - include names, dates, times, and places if possible.
5. Conclude by stating how you would like the problem to be resolved (Refund? Compensation? Free product/service?)
6. Sign off with 'Yours Sincerely' or equivalent and write your full name. You may also wish to include your telephone number and a signature under your name.

Although not a complaint, this letter's format is a good example. Photo by Alan Light

Once you have written your letter, make sure you send it to all the relevant people and follow up to ensure your letter has been received and read.

One final tip - it is important to act as soon as possible after the particular incident when all the details are still fresh in your mind and the anger is still pumping in your veins (i.e. you still care about the problem). If you wait longer, you may forget about it or decide that you actually don't care enough/can't be bothered. At that point, your chance to fight back is completely lost.

P.S.

Things to avoid here are: shouting, being disrespectful, losing your cool, physical or verbal abuse and vengeful acts. We are all human beings at the end of the day, so make sure you raise the problem in a respectful manner!

How to Sort Out Stuff in Your Head

Photo by Airik Lopez

How many times have you cursed certain events for turning your perfectly normal day into a nightmare? Or even worse - how many times have you woken up on the wrong side of the bed? There's nothing worse than starting your day with pouring rain or by missing your train to work and then frowning all day about it. But that's life, right?

Wrong. There are ways to keep a positive outlook on life even in such disastrous circumstances. Remember Oprah's book The Secret? The idea that thinking positively about what you want to achieve (and writing it down on paper) will incline the forces of the universe to work in your favour? Could it be true?

Not sure about the whole grand idea but, judging from life experience, I can't deny putting your mind to something will help you achieve it. Self-talk (i.e. the conversations going on in our heads) is one heck of a powerful tool which helps you achieve happiness and all those great things you set out to achieve.

You see, as common sense would dictate, telling yourself you can do something can help it happen. Telling yourself you can't do something can make that come true as well. For instance, constantly telling yourself that it's very hard to find a job is more likely to lead you to sit and watch telly instead of updating your CV.

So what can we do to make the power of self-talk work in our favour? Well you can't simply will yourself into a positive mood and, most of the time, it can be quite challenging to get rid of negative thoughts. In fact, as a self-proclaimed pessimist I am fully aware of the parasitical nature of negative self-talk.

Photo by Wavy1

But where there is a will, there is a way. For starters, you can address negative thoughts as another person - acknowledge them, but distance yourself as you would from someone's negative opinion or question their validity (i.e. is it true that you will NEVER find a job? Probably not.). If the thoughts are overwhelming put them aside at first and distract yourself with the scope of revisiting them at a later time (perhaps even write them down somewhere and try to forget about them for a while.).

A more long-term solution to escaping the vicious downward spiral of negative self-talk is changing the way you talk to yourself. Don't treat every negative event as a catastrophe - try to let go of negative thoughts by changing the way you describe things.

For example, instead of thinking "I missed the train, will be late and X will be mad at me", tell yourself "I better call and let X know I will be late." It takes time to change the way we think but as long as we are aware of our thought processes we can start working on changing them.

Finally, one thing that particularly works for me is making vision boards or sticking cut outs representing my goals, dreams and happy in a visible place. A good one is on the back of your front door - it puts a smile on your face before I head out.

Photo by Nilson

I hope you found this post interesting. We live and we learn. Remember - never regret anything as you have probably made the right decision based on the information and feelings you had at that time.

Are You Meant to Be a CEO or to Run Your Own Show?

Despite summer coming to an end, thousands of graduates and school-leavers are still left wondering where to take their career. Is it worth fighting tooth and nail for that unpaid internship? Or would it be better to work towards setting up your own business like 63% of current undergraduates? May be something in between?

It is a tough decision to make and one which is bound to influence the next few years of your life. But would you believe it if I said that by looking at your personality and skills you can find out what suits you best? Yep that's right! Read on to find out where you fit.

Would you ask someone directly why they are unhappy with you? Are you confident in making decisions based on your intuition? Is it you who always manages to convince your group of friends that it really is a good idea to go out tonight? Yes? Then you are an entrepreneur through and through. You confront situations head-on, are willing to take a risk and believe strongly in your ideas.

Pumped up to start your own business? First, research your industry thoroughly and try to get as much feedback as possible. You may also want to write a business plan and ask a successful entrepreneur to tell you whether it is feasible or how it can be improved. Don't forget to create a strong and professional online presence for yourself and your business idea - you never know who is Googling you!

Not you? Well then do you make important decisions based on your own research of the issue? Do you enjoy meeting new people and sampling the local cuisine when on holiday? Are you often reliant on mutual friends to approach people and make contacts? If this is you then you've got the ability to be your own boss or become a CEO. Perhaps you've got leadership potential but may lack expertise in certain areas.

In this case, the best thing to do would be to work for someone else to gain the necessary skills and knowledge before launching a business. At the same time you could work on your idea outside office hours. Another option to consider is climbing the career ladder - CEOs are great leaders which make important business decisions and reap great rewards without the stress of running their own company.

Don't fit in these two categories? Perhaps you are not a fan of confrontation and prefer lounging with a book on your holiday. Do you find making important decisions stressful and time-consuming? Believe that it's easier to go with the flow rather than convince people to go your way? Don't worry - you are a dream employee! You are secure in your relationships which makes you the perfect colleague. Having control over your working life is key for you which enables you to rise up the ranks.

So what's next? Avoid getting stuck in your current position by establishing clear goals and asking for feedback. If you are not progressing as quickly as you think you should be look for other companies that will reward you for your dedication.

Either way, both - entrepreneurs and CEOs - earn top dollar (think millions) and there is no right or wrong answer. Of course, not everyone is successful. Both career paths involve hard work and sacrifices. But would you rather do something you enjoy or feel miserable for the rest of your working life? No? I didn't think so. May be it is worth a shot to try out something new... something that fits your personality and skills.

Exclusive: A Day Inside a Fashion and Beauty PR Agency

As the name of the post suggests, I don’t usually write much about personal events and experiences, but considering that the purpose of this blog is to share useful information about looking good, feeling good and doing good in all aspects of life, including career development, I thought it will be very selfish not to.

The day was Thursday the 8th of August and the agency - TALK PR. TALK PR is more than a fashion & beauty PR agency. It specialises in fashion, luxury & lifestyle, beauty, grooming & wellbeing, and technology, innovation & play. Basically it’s the dream workplace for someone like me!

Our schedule was packed with presentations and informal chats with team members from all of the above mentioned areas of expertise as well as a special talk from the founder & editor of La Petite Anglaise Ella Catliff and a group brainstorm session where we had to come up with an event idea for the launch of a new Stella McCartney Adidas collection.

Some of the brands TALK PR works with.

There was so much information given out that I had to take in a significant amount of delicious nibbles (provided by TALK of course) to boost my brain power! 

Here are some bits of information and tips from the day which have stuck with me:

• PR is all about relations - your contacts are gold dust.

• Sometimes PR is also about finding a story where there isn’t one.

• In fact PR is about a lot of things - from event and reputation management, to media placements and crisis communications.

• That is why consistency across all communication activities is key.

• PR content has to connect with an audience without adding to the existing noise of the 5000 daily marketing messages people are bombarded with.

Clearly there are no dull moments in fashion & beauty PR. It is a challenging and varied profession which draws many people from a wide range of backgrounds. 

If you want to find out more whether this is the right career for you I would definitely recommend going to a TALK PR Open Day (the next one is on the 31st of October 2013) and reading Sophie Sterling’s post who also attended an open day in 2012.

Career Networking How-To

Recently I read somewhere that you only have 1% chance of securing a job through vacancy adverts (yes, how depressing). However, I also read that you've got more chances of finding a job or at least making it through to the interview stage through networking, i.e. approaching industry insiders and asking for advice about your career area. In my earlier article on career depression, I mentioned networking as an effective tool in the job hunting process. Turns out it is also one of the most crucial tools.

Photo by buddawiggi

Why? Because ensuring your CV gets to the right person in an organisation will definitely increase your chances of being considered for a position. But how do we do that? Here are a few tips on how to get started:

1. Online networking is the easiest way to start. Clean up all of your social media accounts and boost your professional presence on sites like LinkedIn. Then start following companies and industry leaders, share industry-relevant information and ask questions.
2. Family and friends pose another easy option to start off networking. Ask your near and dear if they know anyone in your chosen filed of work and whether they can introduce you to them.
3. Use your university's alumni service to find past students who are now working in companies or industries that you are interested in. Contact them asking for some advice or information on what it is like to work in that company/industry.
4. Another way to network is through work experience and internships. Make sure you collect business cards and add colleagues on LinkedIn or other social media. Keep in touch by sharing useful information and asking about any job opportunities they may have heard about.
5. If possible, join professional associations such as the Chartered Institute of Public Relations, which offer discounted rates for students and can provide access to events and training.
6. When attending any career- or industry-focused events and conferences, make sure you have prepared a couple of questions which are not answered on the company or event website. Approach people with these questions and ask if you could take down their email address.
7. If you are really eager you may wish to considering finding out where industry leaders meet, both online (LinkedIn groups) and offline (events), and ask existing contacts to invite you.
8. When it comes to the actual nitty gritty of holding a conversation break the ice by finding something in common with the person you are trying to approach. You can find out the common 'thing' by asking about the event, whether their company has been put up for an award or if they are the guest of a sponsor.
9. Been in a conversation with someone for too long? Introduce the person you are speaking with to another contact at the event. If that is not an option you can politely end the conversation by exchanging contact details/business cards or by a simple firm handshake and a "good to meet you".
10. Finally, be proactive. Don't sit and wait for people to approach you either online or off. LinkedIn is perhaps one of the easiest ways to establish contact with key decision-makers.

It's time to wrap up this extra-long post. I hope these tips will be useful, however if you have some more tips of your own or any questions feel free to post them in the comments section below.

Let's Talk About Stress

Stress. We all know about it, but I thought this infographic sums it up well. However, it does not tell the whole story. Do you know any unusual ways in which your body reacts to stress? Any strange side effects?Any tips on how to deal with them? Share your story by leaving a (anonymous) comment below.

How to Fight Against Career Depression

As the time for graduation approaches, many university students are starting to feel anxiety, panic and desperation engulf them. It's not the loss of friends, carelessness and ridiculous dress up parties that is the cause of these feelings. No, it's the bleak prospect of finding a job that torments them.

We've all been told how hard it can be to find a well-paid job we love. Yet, this does not make the job hunting process any easier. In fact, more often than not many begin to feel discouraged, if not depressed, after sending tens of CVs and attending as many interviews without securing a job.

But if we want to live 'the good life' (a.k.a. independence and money), we've got no choice but to keep on trying. So here are some tips and ideas how to avoid 'career depression' and keep yourself motivated until you get that dream job.

Image courtesy of winnond at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

• First of all make sure you know who you are and what you want to achieve in life. As spiritual as it may sound to you, it is often the case that many graduates leave university not quite sure what they are passionate about and what path they want to take in life. Investing some time in developing your 'identity capital' will pay off in the future. To make this search more career-oriented begin by asking yourself these questions: What am I good at and how can I use my natural abilities to their greatest effect? What do I really want from a job and what field of work genuinely fires me up? What sort of work environment would work best for me? Would I be happier starting up my own venture, or would I work best connected to an existing organisation? Reading, watching and listening to inspirational stories, such as the Ted Talk I mentioned in another post, can be of great help.

• Once that is out of the way try to set specific goals in your job search process. Figure out the best way to break into your industry of choice, be it (paid) internships, speculative job applications or additional training. Decide when and how often you will apply for jobs. Sometimes quality is better than quantity. Surprise your prospective employer with a hand written cover letter or a short video attached to your email application. Be realistic - applying for jobs takes time, especially if you want to impress, so start with smaller goals, such as applying to two companies this weekend, and increase them gradually.

Image courtesy of pakorn at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

• Of course, sending your CV and cover letter is only half the work. It's easier to secure a job if you have contacts within your preferred sector or company, because they will speed up the selection process by referring you to the right people. Making contacts can be done through networking. We've heard that many times but how do you network exactly? The Guardian says that "It is possible for graduates to find connections everywhere, from university alumni to your cousin's friend's mother." Find out where key people from your industry meet to network - both online and offline (LinkedIn groups are a good place to start). Attend career and industry related events and bring with you basic, but professional-looking business cards. It's the best way to make sure people remember your name and contact details. Browse through your existing contacts and your university's alumni list to see if anyone has connections to your preferred industry or organisation. If you are a shy bird, you can use Twitter to connect with potential employers. A little goes a long way.

• If all else fails, do not despair. Don't underestimate and undervalue yourself. You spent time and money on education and you deserve a decent job. As the job hunting process stretches over time, be creative and look for other ways to fill in your time. If you don't have the luxury to sit in your mama's house and wait for that dream job, try taking up a part time job or looking for work in companies within your chosen industry but not in your preferred department. Rumour has it that starting in admin/reception positions could lead to promotions and opportunities to move to other departments within the company. If you have the time and resources you can also try to come up with a small scale enterprise idea which will bring you some quick cash and loads of business skills.

So there you go. These tips are just a starting point. Each person will have a different approach to things based on their situation and preferences. Remember to keep your head up and keep on trying.

*This blog post was inspired by Grads.co.uk, a brand new, cool and exciting jobs site dedicated solely to graduate and student recruitment.

S.T.R.E.S.S

Hello lovelies,

Long time no see. Is it because you're busy and oh so stressed? This month has been so busy for so many people that I'm starting to think it should be renamed to Stressuary. Yet there are still people just don't seem to get stressed. Yes, you know who you are. But for the rest of us who are beginning to crack under the pressure of endless work and life commitments, I've decided to write 3 simple tips on how to avoid burnout and breakdowns.

1. Eat well, rest well. Forget about the whole work hard, play hard mantra. That's for superbeings not for us, mere mortals. First of all, don't forget to eat. Fuel your body with loads of proteins and fibre and give yourselves a boost with a bit of sugar and caffeine (don't overdo it). Second, make sure you get adequate rest. Sleep as much as you can, whenever you can. Remember, you don't need to follow a regular sleep pattern - naps can be lifesaving during very stressful periods of time.
2. Exercise. Once your body is fuelled you might want to burn all the adrenalin rushing through your body. To avoid punching the person next to you, simply try doing as much or as little exercise as you can on a daily basis. Even a brisk walk would do. And don't forget to take deep breaths - it really works (as many yoga fanatics would tell you - breathing is the secret of super health [perhaps because it keeps us alive?])
3. Talk it through. Would you believe it that moaning and complaining and telling everyone what you have and haven't done so far is a great stress buster? It may not work for everyone, but telling someone what is bothering you or going over your next plan of action can have a calming effect. It helps you put things into perspective and see things from a different point of view.

Image courtesy of Grant Cochrane at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

So there you go folks. I hope these tips will be useful and if you've got any of your own that you would like to share don't be afraid to post a comment below.

All together now: inhale, exhale.

All the best!

Housing Survival Guide

Here's something that never got published, may be because this information will hurt the real estate business. Well, no matter what I believe we should all know our rights. So read on for a few tips I can offer from my own struggles.

Image courtesy of Jeroen van Oostrom at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Living in town? Looking for a house to share with your mates next year? Then read on. By now most of us should have settled in our new student accommodation wherever it may be. However, if you are experiencing some issues with your new house or have already started looking for a new student pad for next year, then the following tips are for you.

1. Shop around. With so many student accommodation websites and lettings agents this may seem like a tedious task. But it does pay off to spend some time on finding out what the average market rents for shared houses in different areas are. There are very good deals if you start looking early and are willing to pay a deposit. Alternatively, you can wait until prices drop for a bargain last minute deal just before term starts.

2. Don’t skip viewings. These provide the best opportunity to get down to the nitty gritty of housing matters. Be prepared to ask important questions, such as utilities and maintenance arrangements, and look for causes of concern, especially mould marks and wall cracks which could get worse once you start living there.

3. Read your tenancy agreement carefully. Then read it again. It is possible to be put on a separate agreement even if you are sharing the house with your friends. In this way you will not be liable for any damages caused by others. Pay particular attention to the utilities, communal areas maintenance and landlord’s responsibilities clauses. These will tell you who is responsible for repairs and maintenance and help you avoid any fines.

4. Protect your deposit. Under the Housing Act 2007 all private landlords and/or lettings agents are obliged to protect your deposit in a government approved deposit scheme. This should be done within 14 days of the landlord receiving the deposit and you should receive notification that this has been done. Contact your landlord or lettings agent if you have any questions regarding this as soon as possible so that you won’t have to deal with problems when the time comes for getting your deposit back.

5. Seek help. If you are having any trouble with your accommodation, think you are treated unfairly by your landlord or are unsure of your responsibilities and contract obligations, then speak up! There are a number of people and organisations that you could turn to. The university has appointed several community wardens for popular student housing areas in Loughborough. If you have any questions you can find contact details and advice at www.lboro.ac.uk/services/community-wardens/. There is also a Citizen Advice Bureau in the town centre which can help you with a wide range of housing matters. It also provides expert advice on certain issues by telephone, drop in appointments or at www.citizenadvice.org.uk.

Finally, if you just want to know more or prefer seeking advice online don’t forget to check www.direct.gov.uk’s section on student housing under the Education and Learning tab. 

Good luck!

P is for Priority

Nobody knows exactly who they want to become or what they want to do in the next phase of their life. But everyone knows what needs to be done now - today, tomorrow, this week, this month... We all have something that needs to be done now or in the near future. Some of us have more than others, but there is always something to be done.

Sometimes we may feel inundated with tasks, at other times we need to choose which tasks to complete simply because we don't have the resources to do more than one thing. We've all been there, we've all been told something or another related to time management. But things don't always work out the way we want them to. And then we get busy catching up on things that need to be done.

All of this begs the question: do we just spend our lives getting things done? Isn't there more to life than just finishing that project? There certainly is! But to discover that something we need more than time management. We need to be realistic and make some choices.

Are you involved in too many things? Are your commitments keeping you away from something you truly love and enjoy doing? Is your diary or schedule constantly full, despite excellent time management? Well then may be it's time to re-evaluate your priorities. 

Now I'm sure we all know how to prioritise. You just dedicate more time and energy to some things more than others. Simple right? But how do you choose what to prioritise? Is it just a matter of what needs to be done urgently? Possibly, but we also need to think about our long term goals and dreams.

Are your commitments going to help you reach your goals and dreams? Do they make you happy or do they just seem like an effort? It's alright to let go. We are not superhuman and can't do everything. That's why we need to decide what is truly deserving of our time and energy. All I'm trying to say is:

It's Your Choice

Life is not difficult. The human body and mind are built for survival. These two little wonders can withstand injury, trauma, shock and pain. They tell us what to do in order to remain alive and even have their own 'survival mode'. If you don't believe me go and Google it or ask your medical student friend or whatever. 

If, by now, you are wondering whether this is a joke or I have been watching too much of Grey's Anatomy, the latter one is closer to the truth. Courtesy of my very dear friend and house mate, I have dived into Seattle Grace Hospital's world of medicine head first (by that I mean watching countless episodes in a day). 

As I was saying... We, mere mortals, are survivors. Not because life is hard, no. We get on with life pretty well, if you ask me, no matter what it throws at us. The real difficulty lies in deciding what we want to do and who we want to become. We don't like being told what to do or who we can be. Oh no, we don't like all those institutions and people trying to take away our freedom. 

We want to keep that freedom to ourselves, even if we don't know what we want to do with it. Here's the difficult part - because we are, supposedly, free human beings we can't blame anyone or anything for our indecisiveness, mistakes and failures. We just have to learn to hold our heads up high and accept the mistakes we make. 

And most importantly not to make the same mistake twice (now that's just plain stupid).